Two Faced

Pillow case wet from the tears that I cried last night

Tossing and turning in bed waking up from my sleep asking myself why

Do I have to be the one

Who carries the heavy burden of mine and the worlds pain

They say your 20s is suppose to be fun

But since I turned 21 I felt nothing but depression and shame.

What have I gained besides my heart getting beat by a cane

Closing my eyes hoping to wake up to my world being changed

It’s all fake

The smile I have on my face is nothing but pretend

Sunny days come where I’m happy but even then I’m not fully sane .

Tears run down my face like a water fall

All these knives being thrown in my back Makes it hard for me to stand tall

I knew there would come a day

Where I don’t have no one to call

Holding back my anger and frustration is the best thing I can only do

I need a place to stay

But I’ll hold my tongue until my face turns blue

Little confidence in myself because I love you

More then I love me

My tears are words that my heart can’t say

So I Look for someone else’s company to come fill this empty space

But it only causes a bigger stain and a stronger heart break

My emotions make me feel like this body takes up space

Sometimes I wish my whole existence could be erased

I already feel forgotten even tho I’m trying to make a positive mental change

if love has become a drug

Then my whole world has been laced

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